Sunday, October 19, 2008

Frustrations

I've determined that I've been frustrated with life lately, the damn curveballs get to me more than they should and maybe it's because I feel like I'm deserving of some things that maybe I'm not. I feel like getting pregnant this time around should be easier, after all 4 1/2 years of tears and frustrations to have Lex felt like more than necessary. I feel that my husband should be more willing to try for another baby because that means more sex something he always wants. I feel that he should want to see me happy with two little children because I put in so much work here taking care of our house and our son and really another child is all I want. I feel like I deserve the job I'm applying for tomorrow because I've put in my dues doing float work, coming in when needed and not scheduled, working hard to learn what I need to do at each clinic, fighting to fit in at clinic after clinic. I feel that my friend who's been ttcing for so damn long should be blessed with a child before any other woman I know who hasn't been through that long journey is. I know life isn't fair but wouldn't it be nice if it was once in a while?

4 comments:

MrsDrink said...

Oh hunny...(((BIG HUGS)))


You've certainly put in your time and no way should you have to put in more for your second little one. Just playing Devil's advocate here, but maybe DH is thinking about finances and whatnot and I guess that's better then not worrying about it all...but I know that only having 50% of your team willing to try for #2 can be frustrating.

I'm keeping my fingers crossed really tight and praying that it won't take you nearly as long for #2. You've always been there for me with encouraging words and a big hug...and that's exactly what I'm going to try to do for you. I may not always have the right thing to say, but I ~will~ listen and I'll always have a big hug waiting for you!

=)

nancy said...

Yes, it would be awesome if life was fair.

Shauna said...

Life is a bitch, that's for sure. Big, big (((hugs))) for you Cate. You deserve anything and everything that your heart desires.

Shannon said...

Hi Cate! How I wish life were fair. I try to believe that things happen for a reason and that everything will work out for the best. It is hard sometimes though.