Why do I do this to myself?

Since Lex and Nate are napping and I didn't want to do dishes I decided to check in on my friends on the varying boards from ttc, to pregnancy, to parenting. Now I had no problems reading the ttc or parenting boards as I rarely do, but when I got to the pregnancy boards I got bummed out. Like tears, woe is me bummed. I'm getting back to the point that I envy pregnant women. On our way home from Minneapolis last night we stopped for gas in Hinckley and I saw two pregnant women and I wanted to cry. Don't get me wrong I'm blessed as all heck to have Lex but I would give my left arm to have another and based on the 2 1/2 month long cycle and inability to get Nate to agree to try again I know it's going to be a long trek to the next time I will get to break out the maternity clothes. But anyway I was reading on the pregnancy after infertility board (women I could relate with and a few I care deeply for) and one of my friend's has "I don't ovulate" in her signature and for some reason that stung, as she concieved this one on her own... just metformin and sex (which is wonderful as her daughter was IVF and she is a great mother) and I know right now I don't ovulate (outside of the birthcontrol issue). I'm such an ingrate... ignore me.