Thanksgiving has come and gone leaving in it's wake some hurt feelings and sadness. This is the last thanksgiving one of my grandmothers will be living in the house she shared with her husband of many years. It was an odd feeling being at her house without Ray being there and while it's sad that she has to move out of her home because that odd feeling follows her around every day that she lives there I'm happy for her. She is moving to a smaller apartment near my house and near my aunt and uncle, it is literally within walking distance for me and Lex.
The hurt feelings came from my other grandmother. She decided to host dinner for my mom's side of the family this year, in her small apartment. This meant containing my rambunctious son in one room filled with fragile items. Needless to say he had several melt downs and his mommy had a couple herself. I ended up not eating dinner because I was so frustrated my stomach was in knots and then my grandmother's off handed comment about Lex's squeals (at that moment they were squeals of joy because he was playing with my dad) and not knowing how I could handle them. My mom came to my defense saying that I do it just how she did it with her kids and my mom and aunt did with her kids, of course grandma couldn't take that as an answer, she had to say that my mom and aunt never screamed like that. It frustrated me to tears. She doesn't get that he has certain problems her girls never had.
Speaking of Lex's problems he is in occupational therapy again, one hour a week. The therapist told Nate she's going to teach us techniques to help him meet his sensory needs. We are going to learn brushing and joint compression as well as how to help him separate himself to regather and come back when he's overwhelmed. We bought him a tent to do that at home but it's so large we can't take it with us everywhere. I can't wait to learn these techniques and teach his teachers at daycare so we can help him to the best of our abilities. I want to get him involved in the Scottish Rite Center but we have limitations in time with Nate being in school and me needing to bring home the bacon. We'll just have to see what the future brings.
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I get very annoyed at other people, generally those of the older generation, who try to tell us how to raise our kids and that if we'd just do it their way, our kids would be perfect. Well, no. Particularly not our kids. I guess I have it easier in that I can just say "my kid has cancer" or something related to that, and people can't argue with me.
Ultimately, hard though it is, you have to remember that "those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter."
((hugs)) ignore the comments she has no idea what is going on in your daily life. Oh and look for a tunnel for when your out and about. It can be folded up.
We have a tension vest for the boys that works wonders. A cheap way to do it is to give big bear hugs. We love the tent we got from IKEA. They have a tunnel like at OT too.
It was my papaw who made the comment about the boys, and I think sometimes people in their generation don't understand because things weren't as well understood about kids back then.
((hug))
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